If you are under 18 do not read this, it contains: gore,loli,rape,torture,scat,vore.

my first story so please forgive the spelling mistakes and give me comments to tell me the good the bad and if I should write again.(sorry for all the mistakes, think of it as a sample story)
Wrote it to give back :)

Introuduction (Exposition)

this story is about Alex, a boy still in highschool. Alex is 15 and has an average hieght of 5'11. He has a
muscular build and brown, short, straight hair. Alex lived a pretty normal life and didn't have a care in the world, until now. Alex's mother forced him to take home economics class so he could take over some of her duties. At first he didn't care but his first week was awful. the class only had girls in it and they made fun of him for being the only boy.
He tried to ignore them but they would not let up. his teacher was no exeption. she would hover over him and yell at him for the tiniest mistake. Alex was miserable and he wanted revenge, but was powerless. One day Alex was walking home from school and was being followed. he didnt notice for quite a while so he had no idea how long the shadowy figure had been there. He turned corners and jay walked to try to lose him but he followed closely. When they reached a park Alex was tired and he turned around. he steped back and the man stepped forward. "what do you want" yelled Alex. the man smiled and said "I want to help you get revenge". "I have been watching you and you are tormented". Alex was listening now. the man took his hand out of his jacket and it was holding somthing. Alex thought it was a gun but before he ran he reconigzed it as a flashlight. the flashlight had a few more buttons on it than normal. Alex stared at. "Do you like it"?, the man said. "What is it" Alex replied. Its a shrinker said the man. the man put it down and walked away. Alex reluctantly took it home. he didnt believe it was a real shrink ray but he thought it looked cool. he pointed at his lamp in the corner. he fliped a switch and a beam of light shined on the lamp. then the lamp got smaller
and smaller until Alex turned the light off. he was in shock. He had plans.


It was saturday but the home economics class was meeting because they had a sewing project that was behind scheldule. alex came late. he slowly walked into the school. it was silent but as he approached the classroom he heard chating between students. he stood behind the door and took out the shrinking flashlight. he grabbed the doorknob and threw the door open. he turned on the light and shined it across the room flashing back and forth until no one was to be seen. they were gone. well not gone but shrunk so Alex could only see the left over cloths. the room fell silent. then Alex focused his hearing and heard very high pitched screeches. a grin washed over his face. he turned back and closed the door behind him. then he looked around but saw no one, they were hiding. Alex was in no hurry he looked over at the empty clothes, shirts,skirts,ribbons, and panty's. this was his time for revenge, the very thought exited him. he went through the room gathering the clothes and putting the in the corner. he thought he saw some of his class mates but he was patient. after that he moved all the desks in a corner fliping them upside down so none of his toys could hide under them. the room was empty exept for the corners and sewing supplies on the shelf and cooking supplies taking up the complete right side. it was time to hunt. Alex put the shrinking flashlight into his pocket. he patted the cloths down to make sure no one was hiding. he saw no one but he had pretty good ideas for were they were hiding. now that he was done moving everything he heard the crying and screaming and swearing. the door was locked and the windows are too high, they were trapped. he was ready.

he walked around the room looking for his toys. he spotted somthing near the pile of cloths. she must have hid there while he was moving the desks. he walked towards the cloths. spread them apart in two piles. he saw a pair of naked legs peaking out. he grabbed them by the feet. she squirmed but Alex effortlesly pulled her out. she was very small but not too small. she was almost one foot and came up to his shins. Alex recognized her, she was quite popular in the class. she was cute. she had long brown hair and very pale skin. her breasts were big, a c cup probally. her vagina was completly bald as were most of the girls who wanted to be popular. she was paralyzed with fear. alex held her in one hand. it was time for payback. he started playing with her breasts with his thumb rubbing them roughly. the tiny girl screamed with pain. she felt like her breasts were being ripped apart. another 2 minutes passed without alex letting up she was crying and her breasts were bruised all over. then he started
rubbing harder and harder. he was crushing her ribs. the tiny girl bit her lip and had tears in her eyes. then he stopped. he lifted his thumb and placed it on her stomach to keep her in place. her breasts were red and blue and started to swell. the tiny girl felt like her chest was on fire. then alex brought her to his face. he started to massage her breasts with his tounge.
the tiny girl relaxed a little. the tounge felt good on her beaten breasts. then he starts to suck on them which brought back the pain. alex then brought her breasts in his mouth and bit. the tiny girl screamed louder than ever before. his teeth were clenched against her nipple. she was helpless. her arms in his grasp and legs flailing harmlessly under the bottom of hand occasionaly kicking his chin. he started to grind his teeth and they cut off the nipple immediatly. alex spit it out and blood poured down her body onto his hand. she was moving every part of her body she could. rapidly she kicked her legs and shook her head. alex didnt play this time he quickly bit of the other one. there was little change in her reaction. alex put her back on the floor. she couldnt get up. she kept screaming and she grabbed her breasts which only made the pain worse. blood all over the floor, she couldnt get up let alone run. about a half an hour later she calmed down, either from exaustion or she got used to the pain. she was still laying on the floor panting and then she started to crawl away. very slowly she crawled on her belly by kicking her legs and pushing against the floor with her hands dragging her breasts but she past out without getting far. alex picked her up and brought her to the sink were he washed her with water washing off the blood and waking her up. he put her in the sink. she tried to stand but it was to slipery. she just layed there. alex picked her up again and set her on her back. she offered no resistance. he then carfully grabbed the base of her breasts and sqeezed. all the flesh popped out of her breasts. the tiny woman froze with shock and then passed out again. alex got frusterated by this and decided it was time for her to die. he took the loose skin from her breasts and started to tear. the skin was very tough but he kept going. the tiny girl awoke several times screaming and several times passing out. he peeled the skin passed her shoulders and then down her back all the way to her legs. he left the neck up intact. the girl
woke up but didnt scream she only cried. alex found cleaning supplies and mixed them together to make a kind of awakener. he dipped his finger in it and let one drop land on her face. the tiny girl felt her eyes burn with intensity and they turned red but she couldnt pass out. alex sat there for 10 minutes and watched her bleed to death.

alex left the body there and went out to hunt again. it was going to be harder this time because they had time to hide. he walked towards the ovens for there were alot of nooks and crannies someone small could hide. he leaned over to check the back of an oven when he felt a sharp pain in his leg. he swore under his breath grabbing his leg. he looked down and saw one of his toys with a needle in her hand. he knocked her off her feet with a flick of a finger carful to avoid the needle. he picked her up and placed her on the oven. alex was delighted with who it was. it was the teacher. the teacher was a bit bigger than the last because she was an adult but still small. she was beautifle and mature. she had black long black hair with tanish skin. her breasts were smaller at a b cup but they were round and perky. her vagina was trimmed. alex had somthing else for the teacher in mind. alex took off his pants then his boxers. his penis exposed. they teacher stood and tried to run but there was no way off the oven. alex grabbed her legs and the rest of her hit the floor. he dragged her against the smooth surface. his penis was getting hard and grew. alex knew his large cock wouldnt fit so he took out his shrink ray and instead of shrinking he enlarged her. only just enough so she was half his hieght with the same amazing figure. her fight was harder this time but still futile. he grabbed both of her legs with each hand and pulled her closer. she didnt scream she swore and yelled. her vagina and his penis finally touched. the teacher twitched. alex started to pull. her vagina was still tiny so he to push hard. he pushed harder and harder until he went inside. this time she screamed loudly. blood came pouring out and her lips were tight agianst his cock. the teacher felt herself getting ripped apart, stretching and breaking. alex pushed forward he felt the warm juices coming out and kept going. the teacher screaming as he went. then he stopped. he wasnt done he just needed somthing. he reached over to his previous station and grabbed the awakening solution. one drop and he was back. he kept going until he was all the way in. the teacher was panting like she was in labor. she had more than she handle but alex didnt. he grabbed the shrinker again and shrank her. he felt her body closing around his penis and she felt his penis getting bigger. he stopped when he felt somthing inside her. her cervix. he pulled back but not out and thrust foward with all his might. he felt the resistance break away. the teacher screamed with pain scratching at her vagina alex watched this for a couple minutes until she finaly stoped. she laid back waiting to die. alex wanted to make her suffer. he shrunk even more as he her organs seperate. the teacher did nothing but breath. she was her origanil small self barly alive. her inards were seperated. she tried to talk but only got out two words "kill me". alex heard this. he watched the teacher who was now a penis puppet stay limp but alive and awake. he dragged his penis off the oven with the teacher still on it. he carried with his cock to a chair and sat down. the teacher was impaled on his cock and now she was on top of it. alex sat there looking at her barley alive filled with pain. he let her suffer for 5 minutes and then he ejacultated. her eyes grew big, the first sign of life for awhile.her body grew big as he filled her up like a balloon. her eyes rolled back and she died. sperm coming out of her nostrils and eyes. he pulled out and the rest of the sperm poured. his penis was covered in seamen and blood. he washed it off and placed the split teacher next to the skinless girl.

alex was very exited now. he kept his pants of as he hunted for someone else. this time he spotted two girls next to the desks. they were sisters who did everything together even make fun of alex. they had long blond hair with pale skin. there breasts were almost none existant and had no hair on there vaginas. he grabbed them both at once each with one hand. this time they pled. "please let us go" they cried. alex had other plans. he brought them over to the sewing table and placed them down they stood holding eachother looking at him with fear in there eyes. he grabbed the sewing supplies off a shelf above the desk. he set it down next to them which made them fall from sudden noise. alex grabbed a pair of scizzors from the supplies which made the siblings grasp eachother harder. alex almost forgot the solution one drop and two drops. he pinned them down with one hand and held the scizzors in the other. he cut off one of the sisters legs with extreme speed. she shrieked so loudly that he heard another wimper from across the room. probaly another toy he would have to deal with later. the sister closed her eyes and covered her ears. then alex went for the arms. blood was pouring from each of the nubs. alex didnt want her to die yet so he grabed a needle and thread and sewed close the bleeding stumps. alex stood up and took the patched up girl to the oven. he grabbed a small pan and basting liquid. he put her in the pan and basted her. she was coughing trying to cough up the basting stuff. alex pulled open the oven and stuck her in. he turned on the heat to low. the tiny girl felt her arm and leg nubs burn and slipped all over on the basting stuff. she felt the heat. it was cooking her. she couldnt do anything. the basting stuff kept her skin from boiling but drew the heat into her. her hair started to fall and she turned brown. the basting stuff gone. alex took her out. she was still alive. alex had to take her out carfuly or the tempature diffrence could kill her from shock. he placed the pan next the the other girl who hadnt moved from a balled up crying posistion. alex took out the shrinker and enlarged the cooked sister. he grabbed the the balled up sister who started pleading once more and pushed her into the vagina of the cooked one. the girls screamed in unison. the cooked one even peed. alex left the other sister's head out so she could breath. he placed them back in the oven and set it to high. they girls screeched and boiled and then fell silent. alex took them out. the bigger one was dead. the little one was still alive. he took the little out, her skin was peeling and her hair was gone. alex put her back in the vagina and suffocated her. he put them next to the skined girl and the empty teacher.

alex went toward the coupard where he heard the noise. he opened and spotted one. this one was younger than the others. she was moved up a couple grades because of her genius. she was shy and only 12. she had short brown hair and very tiny breasts. she was pale and her vagina was void of hair. alex picked her up. he had no grudge against this girl but he still was horney. he enlarged her to her full size because he knew he could overpower her at any time. alex grabbed her and laid her down. she did nothing. she kept her hands over her eyes and stayed silent. alex went on top of her and inserted himself in her. she let out a silent sqeal. she started to bleed. alex ejaculated. she slapped him out of surprise. alex was pissed. he pulled out and shrunk her agian. he grabbed a fistful of needles and dropped them beside her. she was crying now. he grabbed one needle and inserted it in the side of her breast. then he stuck it all the way through and continued to the next. she passed out. alex didnt care this time. he picked her up and put her in the middle of the room. he enlarged her so big that her head and feet touched oppisite walls. she was still unconcious. alex crawled over her giant and brought a scaple. he came up to her cunt and entered. he stepped in with both feet and arms but kept his head out. he felt around. he found what he was looking for. he cut a tube that led to the brain and stepped out. he shrunk her, added the solution and she woke up. she was normal size again. she laid there silent peeking at him through her fingers. her breasts were in pain from the needle. which was loss in her breasts because she was normal size. alex waited 5 minutes for his handywork to take affect. she began to moan. liquid came out of her cunt. alex cut the nerve that controls orgasms. again and agian she came. she was so tired she was panting but otherwise didnt move. the floor around was one big puddle. alex shrunk her once again. she was drowning in her own juices. she had no strengh to save her self. alex lifted her out. she came again. he held her for 4 minutes until she died form dehydration. he then set her next to the skinned girl, the empty teacher, and the cooked sisters.

alex was on the prowl again. it took him a half an hour to find his next victim. she sat next to always saying somthing bad. she had long black hair and very large breasts. she was pale and her vagina was very bushy. alex lifted her by her breasts. she screamed. he decided to enlarge a little. he through her on the table and started to punch her cunt. over and over. she screamed over and over. he used the solution. alex grabbed a knife from the coupared and stuck it in her anus. blood poured out as the girl struggled. alex twisted it. her anus bled and she screamed. alex pulled out the knife and stuffed his penis in her anus. he pounded away. alex ejaculated inside of her. the body twitched. alex shrunk her again. he brought her to a sewing machine. he broke off the bottom and put the needle in upside down. he placed the tiny girl under it and turned it on. it rapidly went in her ass going up and down faster than the eye can see. the girl felt the pressure and clenched her fists. alex pulled her out and turned it off. her ass bleeding badly and her pussy beaten. he took her and placed her on the oven, she had no will to move. alex took her and stook her up his ass feet first. he clenched and broke all her bones and killing her prematurly. he set her next to the others.

alex left satisfyed with the shrink ray. he knew more were alive but the special present he brought would take care of that. MEOW

What... The... Fuck?! you're fucking psychotic bro! I mean about 5-10% of that was arousing like extreme bondage, but the other 90% wasn't even sexual and was just killing people for revenge... not my cup of tea. Eh, good effort though. You're nuts lol.

I think its good. Or well, the basic story is good.

It does need to be cleaned up though, you can very easily do that. Just mainly remember that the enter key is your friend, wall of text are not easy on the eyes.

Also you can go into almost any good word processor and clean your grammar up. Sentences start with capitals. That will also clean up any spelling mistakes, but I didn't see many.

It may seem little, but just a once through will really help. And running it by someone else, if they won't vomit. Real friends help you move bodies. It really helps me to keep a story away from my eyes for a few months, then look at it. Most of the time I look back at it and think it's total shit. Probably why I don't have so many thing on here.

You have potential, work on it.

Eh, its not the best story I've read.

I see no scat... maybe I'm just getting worse at skimming?

Ok, you said it was the intro, so I'll trust the vore + scat will come later. : )

Anyways, I think it's a very good story, so far. You definitely need split the story up into a few more paragraphs to make it easier to read.

Other than that, I look forward to the rest of your story. Please, keep up the good work! :D

No, really, this was horrible. You really cannot write for shit. You lack style in your prose, and your unreadable Berlin wall of text has atrocious formatting, is rife with lazy spelling errors and haphazard mistakes. I'd advise you to use a word processor before posting your ill fantasies on here, and making sure it is at least coherent and readable. This kind of rubbish is the cancer that is killing /lit/. Well, maybe it was rather stillborn.