1 Name: Al Shaitan : 2009-10-17 21:40 [Del]
(Please note: the following work makes fun of Islam, the Koran, conspiracy theories, horror stories, crap about Baphomet (whose name started as a mistranslation of "Muhammad"), and more crap about the Illuminati, who are Ron Paultards' favorite punching bag or something. It also has guro overtones. It may be offensive to: Muslims, Satanists, the Illuminati, "Team America: World Police" marionettes, rabbis, monks, mikos, tentacle rape monsters, the media, Allah, and the Devil. I apologize if anyone is so offended.)
This is a page from the book of Baphomet (Shit Be Upon Him), aka the "Quran" or "Koran" or, shall I say it, the "Guro-an"... a disciple of the Shaitan who once lived in Araby with his sheiks and his shebas. The real book of Baphomet has been preserved over the years by the notorious Illuminati, who want to take over the world by controlling the forces of Jihad and by controlling the media. It is also the province of the Baphometans of Durkadurkastan.
From Sura 9, sura parts 34 and 35:
"O you who believe! Oh! Oh! Yes! Yessss! Oh! Ahhhh. Indeed many of the rabbis and monks and mikos devour the delicious body parts of people by false means, and debar them from the way of Al-Shaitan aka Allah. Those who hoard up gold and silver (and cum.... and cum...) and do not spend it in the way of Allah, give tidings unto them of a paaaaaaainful punishment!"
"The day will come when the rabbis' and monks' and mikos' treasures shall be heated in the flames of Hell, and their foreheads, sides, boobs, cunts, and backs be branded with them saying, "Here is that treasure which you hoarded for yourselves, taste, now, what you were hoarding up."
From Sura 9, sura part 81:
"...There were hippies who said "Do not go forth in this heat. We want to get stoned on marijuana!" Say unto them: "The fires of Hell are far hotter." If only they would understand! Let them laugh; much will they weep, as a reward of what they earned. Their vaginas will be torn and they will be disemboweled..... and they will be roasted.... and they will writhe in pain to the tune of bad disco music! AHAHAHAHAHHHAHAHAHA!"
There are commands in this religion of Baphomet, a dark and vengeful faith of the horned idol whose representation is the dark Kaaba in tortured Mecka...they are commanded by their leaders to go forth in numbers, and bomb and burn and rape and kill. Caveat emptor!
There is also the Sura of the Tentacle Rape Monsters, Sura 81, for some strange reason entitled "The Wrapping Up".
"When the sun (Amaterasu Omikami) is wrapped up in shimmering latex, and when the stars fall, losing their cum; and when the mountains dance, and when the nine-month pregnant women are abandoned to the tentacle rape monsters; and when the monsters herd the women together like wild beasts, and when the sea is set a-boiling like a thousand kettles on the fires of Hell; and when souls are forced together, and when the girl that was buried alive asks what sin she was slain for, and when the guts of the men's deeds are flayed bloodily open, and when the heaven is torn away and the Hell is set a-flamin' mighty hot; and when the Tentacle Paradise is brought near, then every soul will know what the fuck it has done. Oh, I swear by the orgasmically writhing planets (Sailor Moon et al.), and by the stars that rise and set, and by the night as it falls, and by Aurora as she breathes, that this is verily the message of a glorious wanker, that your companion is not crazy... he is a NUT! He saw him on the clear horizon while doing drugs. He does not withhold the unseen; nor is this Quran the work of Allah. It is, verily, the work of a Shaitan; and O you believers are all pwn3d! The tentacle rape monsters will grab you and rip you painfully and slowly to shreds! OH NO! THE HORROR! AHH- **(chokes on own blood)**"
Well well well... so now we know the Illuminati are behind the Taliban!
